• Everything hurts; and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work.
• The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.
• Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D. and M.B.B.S.
• Your children begin to look middle aged.
• You finally reach the top of the ladder and find it leaning against the wrong wall.
• You look forward to a dull evening.
• Your favorite part of the newspaper is "20 years ago today."
• You turn out the lights for economic rather than romantic reasons.
• You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
• Your knees buckle and your belt won't.
• You regret all those mistakes you made resisting temptation.
• Your back goes out more than you do.
• A fortune teller offers to read your face.
• The little old gray haired lady you help across the street is your wife.
• You have too much room in the house and not enough in the medicine cabinet.
• You know all the answers but nobody asks you the questions.
[ Author Unknown -- from John Traver ]
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