Friday, May 24, 2013

What do TV Ads show us

Sent to me by Sunil Hemdev

1. Kareena has dandruff problem, Katrina has dry hair problem, Shilpa has hair fall problem and Priyanka has chip-chip.

2. If you've a wife make sure your neighbor doesn't use a deodorant in your absence.

3. Your complexion is more important than your qualifications.

4. Saif Ali Khan din bhar Appy Fizz & Lays khata hai and still Bade Aaram Se FIT rehta hai.

5. If there is no salt in your kitchen you can use Toothpaste.

6. You can change your country by drinking Tata Tea.

7. Every second oral care brand is No. 1 and recommended by every dentist in India!!!

8. If your daughter is not Ready to Get married.., take her to a jewellery shop.

9. Only reason why men use deodorant is to get girls.

10. Most colas cure all kinds of phobias. You will be close to a superman, if you drink these regularly!!

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Thursday, May 23, 2013

A College student and A Senior Citizen

A college student challenged a senior citizen, saying it was impossible for their generation to understand his. “You grew up in a different world,” the student said. “Today we have television, jet planes, space travel, nuclear energy, computers…”

Taking advantage of a pause in the student’s litany, the geezer said, “You’re right. We didn’t have those things when we were young; so we invented them! What are you doing for the next generation??”

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Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Spellings are very important

A HUSBAND WROTE A MESSAGE TO HIS WIFE ON HIS OFFICIAL TRIP & FORGOT 'E' AT THE END OF A WORD, "I AM HAVING SUCH A WONDERFUL TIME ! WISH YOU WERE HER 

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Thursday, May 2, 2013

Article from internet


Why is the child in hands of the beggars always asleep? (MUST READ AND SHARE)
“Why is sleeping child in the hands of beggars? Have you ever wondered … ”
This article I read a few months ago. Who is the author of, I don’t know.
Please read…..
“”Near the metro station sits a woman of uncertain age. Women’s hair is confused and dirty, her head bowed in grief.
The woman sits on the dirty floor and next to her lies a bag. In that bag people throw money. On the hands of a woman, asleep, is a two year old baby. He’s in a dirty hat and dirty clothes.
“Madonna with baby” – numerous passers-by will donate money. The people of our kind- we always feel sorry for less fortunate. We are ready to give unfortunate people the last shirt, the last penny out of your pocket and never think another issue.
Helping, seems like. “Good job done”…
I walked past a beggar for a month. Did not give any money, as I knew that this is a gang operated scam and money collected by the beggar will be given to whoever controls beggars in the area. Those people own numerous luxury properties and cars.
Oh and beggar also gets something, of course “ A bottle of vodka in the evening and a döner kebab”.
A month later, walking past the beggars, as shock, it suddenly hit me…. I’m staying at a busy crossing, stared at the baby, dressed as always- dirty track suit. I realized that it seemed “wrong”, finding a child in a dirty underground station from morning to evening.
The baby slept. Never sobbed or screamed, always asleep, burying his face in the knee of a woman who was his MUM.
Do any of you, dear readers, have children? Remember how often they slept at the age of 1-2-3 years? Hour two, maximum three (not consecutive) afternoon nap, and again – movement. For the whole month, every day of my walking in the underground, I’ve never seen a child awake! I looked at the tiny little man, with his face buried in the knee of his mother, then at the beggar, and my suspicion was gradually formed.
– Why he sleeps all the time? I asked, staring at the baby.
The beggar pretended not to hear me. She lowered her eyes and hid her face in the collar of her shabby jacket. I repeated the question. The woman again looked up. She looked somewhere behind my back, tired with utter irritation. Her look was similar to the creatures from a different planet.
-F **k off … her lips murmured.
-Why is he asleep?! I almost cried …
Behind me someone put his hand on my shoulder. I looked back. A some old man was looking at me disapprovingly:
– What do you want from her? Can’t you see how hard she’s got it in her life… Eh …
He gets some coins from his pocket and throws them in the beggar’s bag.
Beggar made a hand wave of a cross, portraying the face of humility and universal grief. The guy removed his hand from my shoulder and strolled out of the underground station. I bet, at home, he will tell how he defended poor, distraught woman from a soulless man in a tube station.
Next day I called a friend. It was a funny man with eyes like olives Romanian nationality. He only managed to complete three and a half years of education. The complete lack of education does not prevent him from moving around the City streets on very expensive foreign cars and live in a “small” house with countless number of windows and balconies. From my friend I managed to find out that this business, despite the apparent spontaneity, clearly organized.
Its supervised by begging organized crime rings. The children used are in “rent” from families of alcoholics, or simply stolen. I needed to get the answer to the question – why is the baby sleeping? And I received it. My friend Gypsy said the phrase, completely ordinary with calm voice that twisted me in shock, just like he was talking about weather report:
- They are on heroin, or vodka …
I was dumbfounded. “Who is on heroin? Whom – under vodka?! ”
He answered, “The Child, so he doesn’t scream. The women will be sitting whole day with him, imagine how he might get bored?”
In order to make the baby slept the whole day, it pumped up with vodka or drugs. Of course, children’s bodies are not able to cope with such a shock. And children often die. The most terrible thing – sometimes children die during the “working day”.
And imaginary mother must hold another dead child on her hands until the evening. These are the rules. And the by passers-by will throw some money in the bag, and believe that they are moral. Helping “mother alone” …
… The next day I was walking near the same underground station. I stocked up journalistic identity, and was ready for a serious conversation. But the conversation didn’t work out. But turned out the following …
A woman was sitting on the floor and in her hands she was holding a child. I asked her a question about the documents on the child, and, most importantly, where was yesterday’s kid, which she simply ignored.
My questions were not ignored by passers-by. I was told that I was out of my mind screaming at poor beggar with a child. All in all, I was escorted out of the tube station in disgrace. One thing remained was to call the police. When police arrived, beggar with the baby disappeared. I stood with a full sense of – “I’m trying to fight windmills”.
When you see in the subway, on the street whether women with children, begging, think before your hand climb for money. Think about that, if it wasn’t for your hundreds of thousands of handouts, the business like this would have died. The business would die and not the children-inflated with vodka or drugs. Do not look at the sleeping child with affection. See horror… Since you’re reading this article, you know now- why the child is sleeping in beggars hands.
P.S.
If you copy this article on your wall or just click “Share”, your friends will read it too. And when you decide again to open your wallet to throw a coin to a beggar, remember that this charity could cost another child’s life.”"
Originally posted by – Amritanshu Singh



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Wednesday, May 1, 2013

wow





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Monday, April 29, 2013

nice




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Thursday, April 25, 2013

Who won?


I saw a beautiful example of kindness during the Special Olympics track and field meet. One participant was Kim Peek, a brain-damaged, severely handicapped boy racing the 50 yard dash.

Kim was racing against two other athletes with cerebral palsy. They were in wheelchairs; Kim was the lone runner. As the gun sounded, Kim moved quickly ahead of the other two. Twenty yards ahead and 10 yards from the finish line, the turned to see how the others were coming. The girl had turned her wheelchair around and was stuck against the wall. The other boy was pushing his wheelchair backward with his feet.

Kim stopped, went back and pushed the little girl across the finish line. The boy in the wheelchair going backward won the race. The girl took second. Kim lost.

Or did he? The crowd that gave Kim a standing ovation didn’t think so.



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Friday, April 19, 2013

wow




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Tuesday, April 16, 2013

quotes




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Sunday, April 14, 2013

Do not miss this type of girl

**When a girl WALKS for miles to see you….
**When a
girl SAYS SORRY even though she didn’t
do anything,..
**When a girl CRIES because she still loves/
misses u….
**When a girl still TRIES TO GET you-
BACK…after disagreement.
**When a girl no matter how much U HURT HER
STILL LOVES U…
**when a girl STOPS her argument
with her guy to
SAVE her relationship…
**When a girl continuously
MAKES U FEEL SPECIAL and
TRIES TO MAKE U HAPPY…
**When a girl is upset but DOES NOT tell u as she
thinks she is ANNOYING YOU…..
**When a girl wants to
LEAVE you- because of your RUDE
BEHAVIOUR but she is not able to do…
.
. .
DO NOT LET HER GO, because U MAY NEVER FIND SOMEONE
LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN. SHE MAYBE VERY SPECIAL
ΑND GOD’S GIFT FOR U.




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Saturday, April 13, 2013

Nurse


Hospital Stay
This is an idea for when they put us in "the Home!" I was sick and in the hospital. There was one nurse that just drove me crazy. Every time she came in, she would talk to me like I was a little child. She would say in a patronizing tone of voice,
'And how are we doing this morning',
Description:  17grinzold-man-hosp-nurse
Or   'Are we ready for a bath', or   'Are we hungry ?'                   
I had had enough of this particular nurse. One day, at breakfast, I took the apple juice off the tray and put it in my bed side stand.
Later, I was given a urine bottle to fill for testing.
So you know where the juice went !
Description:
The nurse came in a little later, picked up the urine bottle and looked at it. 'My, it seems we are a little cloudy today.'
At this, I snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top, and drank it down, saying, 'Well, I'll run it through again. Maybe I can filter it better this time.'
  The nurse fainted.......... I just smiled.
Description:  17grinzzfunny-old-man
DON'T MESS WITH  OLD PEOPLE
 
[]


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Thursday, April 11, 2013

NICE




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Tuesday, April 9, 2013

April fools day


.
An Interesting History of 1752
Here is an interesting historical fact that you probably didn't know. Just have a look at the calendar for the month of September 1752.
http://www.projectbritain.com/calendar/images/september/calen.jpg
(If you think I'm joking, you may search it on Google and see it for yourself.)
In case you haven't noticed, 11 days are simply missing from the month.
Here's the explanation: This was the month during which England shifted from the Roman Julian Calendar to the Gregorian Calendar.
A Julian year was 11 days longer than a Gregorian year. So, the King of England ordered 11 days to be wiped off the face of that particular month. (A King could order anything, couldn't he?)
So, the workers worked for 11 days less that month, but got paid for the whole month. That's how the concept of "paid leave" was born. Hail the King!!!
In the Roman Julian Calendar, April used to be the first month of the year; but the Gregorian Calendar observed January as the first month. Even after shifting to the Gregorian Calendar, many people refused to give up old traditions and continued celebrating 1st April as the New Year's Day. When simple orders didn't work, the King George II finally issued a royal dictum; which stated that those who celebrated 1st April as the new year's day would be labelled as fools.

From then on, 1st April became April Fool's Day. History !



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Thursday, March 28, 2013

Bananas



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Saturday, March 23, 2013

You could have

An old married couple were traveling by car. Being seniors, after almost eleven hours on the road, they were too tired to continue and decided to take a room at a hotel. But, they only planned to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road. When they checked out of the hotel four hours later, the desk clerk handed them a bill for $350. The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He told the clerk although it's a nice hotel; the rooms certainly aren't worth $350 for four hours. Then the clerk tells him that $350 is the 'standard rate'. He insisted on speaking to the Manager.

The Manager appears, listens to him, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference centre that were available for us to use.
"But we didn't use them," the husband said.
"Well, they are here, and you could have," explained the Manager. The Manager went on to explain that the couple could also have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers from New York , Hollywood , and Las Vegas perform here," the Manager says.
"But we didn't go to any of those shows," the husband said.
"Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replied.
No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, the husband replied, "But we didn't use it!"

The Manager is unmoved, and eventually the husband gave up and agreed to pay. As he didn't have the check book, he asked his wife to write the check. She did and gave it to the Manager. The Manager is surprised when he looks at the check. "But ma'am, this is made out for only $50.00."
"That's correct. I charged you $300.00 for sleeping with me," she replied.
"But I didn't!" exclaims the Manager.
"Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have."

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ONE STORY A DAY

Monday, March 18, 2013

Look for these qualities in a girl


**When a girl WALKS for miles to see you….
**When a
girl SAYS SORRY even though she didn’t
do anything,..
**When a girl CRIES because she still loves/
misses u….
**When a girl still TRIES TO GET you-
BACK…after disagreement.
**When a girl no matter how much U HURT HER
STILL LOVES U…
**when a girl STOPS her argument
with her guy to
SAVE her relationship…
**When a girl continuously
MAKES U FEEL SPECIAL and
TRIES TO MAKE U HAPPY…
**When a girl is upset but DOES NOT tell u as she
thinks she is ANNOYING YOU…..
**When a girl wants to
LEAVE you- because of your RUDE
BEHAVIOUR but she is not able to do…
.
. .
DO NOT LET HER GO, because U MAY NEVER FIND SOMEONE
LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN. SHE MAYBE VERY SPECIAL
ΑND GOD’S GIFT FOR U.




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Saturday, March 16, 2013

Bus


99% u will have a wrong answer to the question asked in the passage.

Once there was loving couple traveling in a bus in a mountainous area.
They decided to get down at some place. After the couple got down at some place the bus moved on.
As the bus moved on, a huge rock fell on the bus from the mountain and crushed the bus to crumbs.
Everybody on board was killed.

The couple upon seeing that, said, “We wish we were on that bus”

Why do u think they said that?


Scroll down for answer

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Answer:

If they had remained on the bus instead of deciding to get down, the resulting time delay could have been avoided and the rock would have fallen after the bus had passed .



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