Definitions in Hindi

गाली क्या होती है ?” –क्रोध के समय मुख से निकले शब्द अथवा शब्दों का समूह ……, जिनके उच्चारण के पश्चात् व्यक्ति के हृदय को शान्ति का अनुभव होता है.
By : Virendra Varshney, Mathura

अवसरवादी : वह व्यक्ति, जो गलती से नदी में गिर पड़े तो नहाना शुरू कर दे।

अपराधी : दुनिया के बाकी लोगों जैसा ही मनुष्य, सिवाय इसके कि वह पकड़ा गया है।

कार्यालय वह स्थान जहां आप घर के तनावों से मुक्ति पाकर विश्राम कर सकते हैं।

नेता : वह शख्स जो अपने देश के लिये आपकी जान की कुर्बानी देने को हमेशा तैयार रहता है।

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The Balloonist and the Engineer

Realizing he was lost, a balloonist dropped down to ask directions. “Excuse me, but I’m a little off course” he shouted. “I promised to meet a friend an hour ago, I don’t know where I am.”
A woman hollered back: “You’re in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You’re at exactly 40 degrees, 22 minutes, and 21 seconds North latitude and 70 degrees, 30 minutes, and 33 seconds West longitude.”
“Amazing,” the balloonist replied. “You must be an engineer!”
“I am,” she replied, “How did you know?”
“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct, but I can’t use your information. I’m still lost and you haven’t been much help at all. If anything, you’ve delayed my trip.”
The woman thought for a moment, then replied: “You must be in management.” “I am,” replied the balloonist, “but how did you know?”
“Well,” said the woman, “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going. You’ve risen to your position due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems.”
“In fact,” she said, “you’re in exactly the same position you were before we met, but somehow it’s now my fault.”
Source: The Bent of Tau Beta Pi (not sure of original source)

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The Pig and the Cow

A rich man complained to his friend: "People don't like me. They say I'm selfish and stingy. And yet in my last will and testament I have donated all that I own to charitable cause."

His friend said: "Well, maybe the story of the cow and the pig has a lesson for you.""The pig came to the cow and complained: 'People always talk about your friendliness. I know you are friendly, you do give them milk. But they get much, much more from me. They get ham and bacon and lard and they even cook my feet. And yet - no one likes me. To all of them I am just a pig, a hog. Why is that?'
The cow thought it over a bit and then said: 'Perhaps it's because I give while I am still alive!'"

धरती पर हर साल लगभग 50,000 भूकंप आते हैं.

अपनी गुफा से निकलते समय, चमगादड़ हमेशा बाईं तरफ को ही मुड़ते हैं

जिराफ की जीभ इतनी लंबी होती है कि वह अपने कान साफ़ कर सकता है.

जापान के शहर टोकियो में, 50 मिनट से कम दूरी वाली यात्रा के लिए एक साइकिल कार से ज्यादा तेज मानी जाती है

कॉकरोच सिर कटने के बाद भी कई सप्ताह तक जिंदा रह सकता है। दरअसल वह सिर कटने से नहीं, भूख से मरता है

मनुष्य अपने जीवनकाल में लगभग 60 हजार पाउण्ड भोजन सामग्री खा जाता है जो लगभग 6 हाथियों के वजन के बराबर है

डॉल्फिन मछली एक आंख खुली रखकर सोती है

पेंग्विन एक ऐसा पक्षी है जो तैर तो सकता है, पर उड़ नहीं सकता

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Decision Making Without Critical Information

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you £800 to drop that towel that you have on”
After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob.
After a few seconds, Bob hands her £800 and leaves. Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets back to the bathroom, her husband asks from the shower, “Who was that?”
“It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies.
“Great,” the husband says, “did he say anything about the £800 he owes me?”
Management Lesson: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk in a timely fashion with your stakeholders, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

Source: Original source unknown

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Smart investing

A city boy, Kenny, moved to the country and bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.

The next day the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the donkey died last night."

Kenny replied: "Well then, just give me my money back”.

The farmer said: "Can't do that. I went and spent it already."

Kenny said: "OK then, just unload the donkey."

The farmer asked: "What you gonna to do with him?"

Kenny: "I'm going to raffle him off." (Note: To raffle is to sell a thing by lottery - draw lot -! To a group of people each paying the same amount for a ticket)

Farmer: "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!"

Kenny: "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead."

A month later the farmer met up with Kenny and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?"

Kenny: "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars apiece and made a profit of $998.00."

Farmer: "Didn't anyone complain?"

Kenny: "Just the guy who won. So I gave him back his two dollars

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