Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Fairy Tale

Short fairy tale:

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said,
'NO!'

And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing
and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and left the
toilet seat up whenever he wanted.

THE END


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Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Logic

Abbas, a fresh computer graduate from a world class university goes for an interview in a Software company.
The interviewer is Waleed, a grubby old man. And the first question he asks Abbas, is “Are you good at logic?”.
“Of course” replies Abbas.
“Let me test you” replies Waleed.
“Two men come down a chimney. One comes with a clean face and the other comes out with a dirty face. Which one washes his face?
Abbas stares at Waleed. “Is that a test in Logic?”
Waleed nods.
“The one with the dirty face washes his face”, He answers wearily.
“Wrong. The one with the clean face washes his face. Examine the simple logic. The one with the dirty face looks at the one with the clean face and thinks his face is clean. The one with the clean face looks at the one with the dirty face and thinks his face is dirty. So; the one with the clean face washes his face.”
“Hmm. I never thought of that” says Abbas. “Give me another test”
Waleed again holds up two fingers “Two men come down a chimney. One comes out with a clean face and the other comes out with a dirty face. Which one washes his face?
“We have already established that. The one with the clean face washes his face”
“Wrong. Each one washes his face. Examine the simple logic. The one with the dirty face looks at the one with the clean face and thinks his face is clean. The one with the clean face looks at the one with the dirty face and thinks his face is dirty. So; the one with the clean face washes his face. When the one with the dirty face sees the one with the clean face washing his face, he also washes his face. So each one washes his face”
“I didn’t think of that!” says Abbas. ” It’s shocking to me that I could make an error in logic. Test me again!.”
Waleed holds up two fingers “Two men come down a chimney. One comes out with a clean face and the other comes out with a dirty face. Which one washes his face?
“Each one washes his face”
“Wrong. Neither one washes his face. Examine the simple logic. The one with the dirty face looks at the one with the clean face and thinks his face is clean. The one with the clean face looks at the one with the dirty face and thinks his face is dirty. But when the one with clean face sees that the one with the dirty face doesn’t wash his face, he also doesn’t wash his face so neither one washes his face”.
Abbas is desperate. “I am qualified for this job. Please give me one more test”
He groans when Waleed lifts his two fingers”,Two men come down a chimney. One comes out with a clean face and the other comes out with a dirty face. Which one washes his face?
“Neither one washes his face”
“Wrong. Do you now see, Abbas, why programming knowledge is an insufficient for this job? Tell me, how is it possible for two men to come down the same chimney, and for one to come out with a clean face and the other with a dirty face? Don’t you see?



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Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Is it worth?

As the dream of almost every parent, ‘Sameer’ acquired a degree in Software Engineer and joined a company based in USA, the land of braves and opportunity. When he arrived in USA, it was as if a dream had come true for him.
Here at last he was in a place where he always wanted to be. He decided that he would be staying in this country for about Five years in which time he would earn enough money to settle down in India.
His father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat.
He wanted to do something more than him. But sooner he started feeling homesickness and lonely as the time passed. After 2 years, he decided to get married. Told his parents that he has only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for all his friends back home. If he misses anyone then there will be talks. After reaching home he did spent one week going through all the photographs of girls and as the time was getting shorter he was forced to select one candidate.
In-laws told him, to his surprise, that he would have to get married in 2-3 days only, as he will not get anymore holidays in near future to come back to the country again. After the marriage, it was time to return to USA, after giving some money to his parents and telling the neighbors to look after them, he returned to USA.
His wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling his home country increased twice in a week, sometimes 3 times a week. His savings started diminishing. After two more years they started to have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a girl, were gifted to them by the Almighty. Every time he spoke to his parents, they asked him to come to India so that they can see their grand-children.
Every year they decided to visit their country. But part work part monetary conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting their own home was a distant dream. Then suddenly one day he got a message that his parents were seriously sick. He tried his hard but he couldn’t get any holidays and thus could not visit his parents. The next message he got was his parents had passed away and as there was no one to do the last rights, the society members had done whatever they could do. He was extremely depressed. His parents had passed away without seeing their grand children — aah …!
After couple more years passed away, much to his children’s dislike and his wife’s joy they returned to their country to settle down. He started to look for a suitable property, but to his dismay his savings were short and the property prices had gone up during all these years. He had to return to the USA.
His wife refused to come back with him and his children refused to stay in their father’s home country. His 2 children and he returned back to USA after promising his wife that he would be coming back for good after two years.
Time passed by, his daughter decided to get married to a citizen in USA and his son was happy living in USA only. He decided that had enough now and will wound-up everything and will return to his own country. He had just enough money to buy a decent 02 bedroom flat in a well-developed locality.
Now he is 60 years old and the only time he goes out of the flat is for the routine visit to the nearby temple. His faithful wife has also left him and gone to the holy abode.
Sometimes he wondered was it worth all this? His father, even after staying in their home country, had a house to his name and he too has the same as of now, nothing more than that.
He lost his parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.
Looking out from the window he sees a lot of children dancing. This damned cable TV has spoiled the new generation and the children are losing their values and culture because of it. He gets occasional cards from his children asking if he is all right.
Now perhaps after he will die, it will be the neighbors again who will be performing his last rights, God Bless them! But the question still remains the same – ‘was all this worth just for an extra bedroom flat finally?’
He is still searching for an answer…………….!!!!
Special thanks to Pawan Kumar for this story!



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Sunday, November 6, 2011

Prescription

Jane walked into a pharmacy, strolled over to the counter, and caught the pharmacist's attention.

"Can I please get some arsenic?" she asked.

"Arsenic? What do you want arsenic for?" asked the pharmacist.

"It's for my husband," she replied.

"Your husband?" exclaimed the pharmacist, "I hope you don't mean what I think you mean!"

She just nodded.

"Well, lady," he replied, "I'm an honest man. I can't sell you arsenic, I wouldn't if I could, and I don't know what made you think you could just stroll into a respectable store and expect me me to sell you arsenic.!"

She didn't say a word. She just reached into her purse, fished out a photograph, and handed it across the counter. It was a picture of her husband, in bed with the pharmacist's wife.

Slowly the pharmacist looks up, over the counter, and then straight at her. "Lady," he said, "why didn't you tell me you had a prescription?"


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Friday, November 4, 2011

What is Truly Ours and What Others Grant Us

Almost one thousand years ago, in Moslem Spain, there lived a Jew named Rabbi Samuel the Prince. He was very wise, and rose to great power, becoming the Sultan’s treasurer. This aroused the jealousy of the other ministers, who planted rumors that Rabbi Samuel was embezzling money from the royal treasury.
The Sultan decided to put Rabbi Samuel to the test. One day, without warning, he called for Rabbi Samuel, and asked him to make a complete accounting of his personal wealth. Rabbi Samuel was taken aback, but he could not refuse the Sultan’s request. He sat at a table, asked for a quill and parchment, and began writing feverishly. After half an hour, he stopped, reviewed the list silently, and handed it to the Sultan.
The Sultan read the inventory carefully, and slammed it down angrily on the table. ‘Why, this is only a fraction of your wealth. I personally have given you far more than what you list here as your salary. This is a brazen lie! My advisors are correct – you have been dishonest with me in your monetary affairs. I shall personally confiscate everything you own. Guards, take this man away!’
‘Your Majesty’, responded Rabbi Samuel, ‘you asked me for an accounting of my wealth. As you can plainly see, my worldly possessions are not truly mine. At any time, they could be taken from me by robbers, war or natural disaster. In fact, your Majesty has just taken them from me with a single command.’
‘The only possession I truly own is that money which can never be taken from me – the money I have given to charity. You see, a Jew is commanded by the Torah to give one tenth of his income to those in need. The figure I gave you, your Majesty, was the total of all the moneys I have given to charity. That is my true wealth, for the benefit from that money remains mine forever, and can never be taken from me.’
The Sultan was impressed by this profound truth, and promoted Rabbi Samuel to even greater power in his kingdom.”
Rabbi Samuel has hit upon a fundamental aspect of human nature – we are easily confused between what is truly ours and what others grant us. The same is true of corporations. Our stock price is soaring, but that is something that is granted by investors, and could be taken away from us tomorrow by those very same investors, based on factors that are entirely out of our control. What, then, is truly ours? It’s our loyal, highly skilled employees, and the passion and innovation that they bring to their jobs. They are our true strategic assets, and they are what will keep us successful for years to come.
Source: An Introduction to Hasidic Management by Moshe Kranc



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