Inner peace

 I think I have found the secret to inner peace.

I read an article that said the way to achieve inner peace is to
finish things I had started. Today I finished two bags of potato
chips, a chocolate pie, a bottle of wine and a small box of candy. I
feel better already.

Source: Thomas Ellisworth

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Daughter

 

A couple made a deal the night of their Marriage to NOT open the door of their room to anybody who comes knocking in the morning for any reason!

In the morning the parents of the husband came & knocked on the door, the husband & the wife were looking at each other & as they agreed before, they didn't open the door.

After a while the parents of the bride came knocking at the door to check on them, the couple were looking at each other, then the bride dropped a tear & started crying she said: "I cannot keep them knocking & not open the door, I miss them already"

The husband didn't say anything & he let her open the door for her parents.

Years & years passed & the couple had 5 children, the first ones were boys & the 5th was a little girl, when she was born the father was extremely happy that Almighty blessed him with her, & he threw a Huge Party for her in Grand style, people were so amazed with his joy & his happiness that they asked him, why are you so happy with her more than you were before with her older brothers?

He answered simply: "She is the one who will open the door for me"

Baby girls are the comfort of the eyes of their father!

They hold the key to their mother’s hearts!

Daughters are really unique. They care for their parents even after they are married.

It’s rightly said, "A son is a son till he gets a Wife, a daughter is a daughter all her Life!" 

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Puzzle

 Only 5% of Stanford University graduates figured it out! Can you answer all seven of the following questions with the same word?

1. The word has seven letters....
2. Preceded God...
3. Greater than God...
4. More Evil than the devil...
5. All poor people have it...
6. Wealthy people need it....
7. If you eat it, you will die.

Did you figure it out?

The answer is

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 NOTHING!

NOTHING has 7 letters.
NOTHING preceded God.
NOTHING is greater than God.
NOTHING is more Evil than the devil.
All poor people have NOTHING.
Wealthy people need NOTHING.
If you eat NOTHING, you will die.

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How easy it is to fool people

 A student won first prize at the local high school science fair. He
was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to alarmists
practicing junk science and spreading fear of everything in our
environment. In his project he urged people to sign a petition
demanding strict control or total elimination of the chemical
"dihydrogen monoxide (DHMO)."

And for plenty of good reasons, since:

1. it can cause excessive sweating and vomiting
2. sometimes called hydric acid, it is a major component in acid rain
3. it can cause severe burns in its gaseous state
4. accidental inhalation can kill you
5. it contributes to erosion and to the "greenhouse effect"
6. it decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes
7. it is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills thousands every year.
8. prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe tissue damage

Despite the danger, DHMO is often used:

1. as an industrial solvent and coolant
2. in nuclear power plants
3. in the production of styrofoam
4. as a fire retardant
5. in many forms of animal research
6. in the distribution of pesticides
7. as an additive in "junk-foods" and other food products

He asked 50 people if they supported a ban of the chemical.

Forty-three (43) said yes, six (6) were undecided, and only one (1)
knew that the chemical was water.

Source: Thomas S. Ellsworth(posted in a humor newsgroup (rec.humor.funny) -Tom)

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Test

 

This is a good test, with some tantalizing and challenging questions. You should be able to get at least three, but you have to be a genius to get 6/6

  

1.   In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?

2.  Only three words in standard English begin with the letters "dw." They are all common. Name two of them.

3.  There are fourteen punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name half of them?

4.   For readers in cricket playing countries there are 10 ways of being out in Cricket. Hit the ball twice is one. Can you name the other 9?

5.   It's the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form but fresh. What is it?

6.    Name six (or more) things that you can wear on your feet that begin with the letter "S."

============== Answers Below ==============

** Answers - Simple, Right?! **

1.   The pear grew inside the bottle. The bottles are placed over pear buds when they are small, and are wired in place on the tree. The bottle is left in place for the whole growing season. When the pears are ripe, they are snipped off at the stems.

2.   Dwarf, dwell, and dwindle.

3.   Period (full stop), comma, colon, semicolon, dash, hyphen, apostrophe, question mark, exclamation point, quotation marks, brackets, parenthesis, braces, and ellipses.

4.   Cricket: Bowled, Stumped, LBW, Run Out, Caught, Hit ball twice, Hit wicket, Handled ball, Obstructing the fielder, and the one everyone forgets - Out of time.

5.   Lettuce.

6.  Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis, snowshoes, stockings.

Well, now you know the answers! Feel any smarter?

[ Author Unknown -- from 'Will and Guy' (guyn@computerperformance.co.uk) ]

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